AN ONDOY WEDDING

From the journal entry of Atty. Raymond Fortun

Photo: Mangored & Att. Raymond Fortun

This is a story of the power of love in the midst of chaos.

Eli Pablo and Kathryn Louise "KY" Yap were meticulous planners. When they decided to get married at 3PM on 26th September 2009, they spared no effort (and expense) in planning their dream wedding. A super expensive wedding venue (Fernbrook Gardens), an ultra-chic wedding preps place (Vivere Suites), the best flowers, a bonggacious gown from Ammon Velasco, jazzy memorabilia, peacock feather-like fans for all the principal sponsors, an avant-garde main photography team and... oh yeah, twinkling blue shoes for this no-name photographer who likes taking photos of wedding shoes.

On 26th September 2009, Ondoy swamped Metro Manila in rain. Eli and KY's guests and godparents (correctly) decided to stay home rather than getting stuck in traffic and waist-deep waters. Early on, they were told that the way to Fernbrook Gardens was already impassable due to floodwaters, and the venue itself was already surrounded by the rising flood. Even the officiating priest was stranded in Paco, with clearly no humanly way possible to perform the ceremony.


I was a bit lucky. I lived 15 minutes away from Vivere Suites, and met my call time (11AM). However, MangoRed (the main photographer) and East Digital (the videographer) said that they just couldn't make it to the 3PM wedding ceremony on time.


At 12 noon, with their wedding plans in shambles, Eli and KY went out of Room 2017 into the hallway. They sat on the hallway, just the two of them, and had a good talk. I saw Eli comforting KY with sweet, loving whispers, holding her hands. KY was sobbing. And they prayed.


At 12:30PM, Eli and KY came back into the room. In the presence of the only people who were lucky to have gotten through to the hotel (KY's parents, Eli's mom, and close relatives), they announced that they wanted to get married that day -- it didn't matter where.


I started making phone calls. I asked my wife if our parish church was still "operational", and she said yes. I made a call to our parish office and informed them of the situation. They told me that there was a wedding scheduled at 4PM, but even that was in jeopardy because of the rains. I told them that i needed a church and an officiating priest, even if it was at 11PM; they told me to call back in an hour.


At 2PM, Eli and KY had a church and a priest. The wedding would push through at 8PM (after the church's regular 7PM anticipated mass). At around that same time, 1 flower girl and 3 ring/bible bearers arrived.


At 5PM, MangoRed (who had been informed of the change in the wedding time from 3PM to 8PM) arrived. They had to walk 1 hour under the rain along C5 just to catch up to the wedding.


The couple rode on a red 1967 Ford Mustang. It didn't have a bridal bouquet on the hood. It didn't matter -- they were getting married.


When we arrived at 7:30PM, the wedding coordinators asked me if i could scrounge around for a CD player, otherwise, there would be no music for the wedding -- no entrance march, no bridal march, no hymns during the ceremony, no songs during the pictorials after the wedding. I then remembered that: (i) i always brought along my laptop, that had a DVD player and iTunes installed; and (ii) i brought along an audio cable that could connect to the church's sound system. So as soon as the 7PM mass finished, and while the floral company rushed to set up the flowers along the aisles, i was able to set up Eli and KY's selection of songs for their wedding.


At around 8:30PM of 26th September 2009, Eli and KY were bound by God. It wasn't the wedding that they planned and dreamed for. But in their eyes, and the people who were lucky to have witnessed it, they couldn't have asked for more.


Love conquers all.


To a couple that defied Ondoy's wrath and wouldn't have "No" for an answer, may you have a long and happy life together.

A Humbling Weekend

No rich...no poor...no VIPS...all are victims...

Last weekend, we were overwhelmed by what many has said to worst storm that has ever hit the country (which brought more rains that Katrina).

The 15th weather disturbance that hit the Philippines in 2009 dumped a total of 455 millimeters of rain in Quezon City alone in 24 hours, compared to the 250 millimeters of rain that Hurricane Katrina brought to New Orleans in Louisiana in the United States in 2005.

Storm Ondoy ravaged Metro Manila,particularly Cainta, Marikina at Antipolo areas and led a lot of shocked residences to their rooftops, drnched in rains.

As for us, well Ondoy spoiled our house blessing and made my in-laws missed their flight to Abu Dhabi. My mom went to the house blessing but didn't stay long because of the torrential rains. It took her (and my brother Marvin) 3hours to get home when it would just usually take a 30 mins drive from our home in Manuela to my parents house in SoldiersIV.

As for Eds and I, we drove for at least 10hours finding a route to airport so my inlaws can make it to their flight. Sadly areas leading to the airport like Evacom, Alabang-Zapote road were no good and when at last we made it through the expressway, it took us 5hours in Sucat alone. Sadly, my inlaws missed their flight (even though the flight had some delays by itself). It was only yesterday when they were abe to rebook their missed flight.

Though the rains somehow spoiled the house blessing, we were thankful that we never got to experience what other people had in those 6 hours of torrential downpour. This weekend was indeed a humbling one.

Guestbook Tree

from: My DIY Weddings

Facebook | Aby Pasco-Magbag

Facebook Aby Pasco-Magbag

The Love Dare

Over the weekend, I watched FIREPROOF and I loved the movie for it was REAL...

I ame across its website and found out about "The Love Dare"...

The Scriptures say that God designed and created marriage as a good thing. It is a beautiful, priceless gift. He uses marriage to help us eliminate loneliness, multiply our effectiveness, establish families, raise children, enjoy life, and bless us with relational intimacy. But beyond this, marriage also shows us our need to grow and deal with our own issues and self-centeredness through the help of a lifelong partner. If we are teachable, we will learn to do the one thing that is most important in marriage—to love. This powerful union provides the path for you to learn how to love another imperfect person unconditionally. It is wonderful. It is
difficult. It is life changing. This book is about love. It’s about learning and daring to live a life filled with loving relationships. And this journey begins with the person that is closest to you: your spouse. May God bless you as you begin this adventure. But be sure of this: it will take courage. If you accept this dare, you must take the view that instead of following your heart, you are choosing to lead it. The world says to follow your
heart, but if you are not leading it, then someone or something else is. The Bible says that “the heart is deceitful above all things,” and it will pursue that which feels right at the moment.

We dare you to think differently, and to choose to lead your heart toward that which is best in the long run. This is a key to lasting, fulfilling relationships. This journey is not a process of trying to change your
spouse to be the person you want them to be. You’ve no doubt already discovered that efforts to change your husband or wife have ended in failure and frustration. Rather, this is a journey of exploring and demonstrating genuine love, even when your desire is dry and your motives are low. The truth is, love is a decision and not just a feeling. It is selfless, sacrificial, andtransformational. When love is truly demonstrated as it was intended, your relationship is more likely to change for the better. Each day of this journey will contain three very important elements: First, a unique aspect of love will be discussed. Read each of these carefully and be open to a new understanding of what it means to genuinely love someone.
Secondly, you will be given a specific dare to do for your spouse. Some will be easy and some very challenging. But take each dare seriously, and be creative and courageous enough to attempt it. Don’t be discouraged if outside situations prevent you from accomplishing a specific dare. Just pick back up as soon as it is within your ability and proceed with the journey.
Lastly, you will be given journal space to log what you are learning, doing, and how your spouse is responding. It is important that you take advantage of this space to capture what is happening to both you and your mate during the journey.
These notes will record your progress and should become priceless to you in the future.
Remember, you have the responsibility to protect and guide your heart. Don’t give up and don’t get discouraged. Resolve to lead your heart and to make it through to the end.
Learning to truly love is one of the most important things you will ever do.

ST. Gerald Majella: Patron Saint of Expectant Mothers

Prayer: O Great Saint Gerard, beloved servant of Jesus Christ, perfect imitator of your meek and humble Savior, and devoted Child of the Mother of God: enkindle within my heart one spark of that heavenly fire of charity which glowed in your heart and made you an angel of love. O glorious Saint Gerard, because when falsely accused of crime, you did bear, like your Divine master, without murmur or complaint, the calumnies of wicked men, you have been raised up by God as the Patron and Protector of expectant mothers. Preserve me from danger and from the excessive pains accompanying childbirth, and shield the child which I now carry, that it may see the light of day and receive the lustral waters of baptism through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Prayer for A Happy Married Life

Dear Lord,

You well know the sacrifices,
problems and hopes which come to all
who embrace married life.
Give us the grace and love for one another
and unite our hearts
in unselfish harmony so that,
mindful of the needs and wishes of each other,
we can live a devoted life
serving you by our faithful care for the family
which you have given us.
Grant us patience that we may help each other,
to serve and love you here on earth.
May we never violate
our pledge of love and fidelity.
May we accomplish your will in all things
so that we may deserve
to enjoy together in heaven
the happiness of eternity with you.
Amen.

FINALLY!

After nearly 4 months, we finally got our copy of the video (DVD format), we are just counting the days for the album to arrive. We got 2 copies in DVD format so we are thinking of ordering 2 more copies for our respective parent's since burning them would mean it wouldnt have the personalized labels.

Ill be uploading the AVP video soon via Youtube...for now, I guess Ill be relieving the moments by watching these videos...

Busy Married Life...

Last Friday, after a meeting at work, I went on to buy the mattress for our bed. Eds was assigned to buy the bedframe, sadly they ran out of stock with the design that we love but it was agood thing though that we came back last Saturday to check, and good enough they have a new arrival. We went to the mall to buy some linens for our new bed and picked-up the bed frame at the same time. Eds opted that we just pick it up since it would take several days before it can be delivered and since we are nearing the blessing of our house, we cant afford to wait furthermore.

Ysabel Garden set-up

If you think our Sunday means rest day, you are completely wrong. We went to Ysabel Garden to book and reserve for the house blessing and right after, we met with a client who happens to be a fellow W@Wie! We went to have an occular inspection of their ceremony and reception venue- Royal Palms Clubhouse.

Eds went to accompany Love and I and boy, I love the place!

Oh well that's enough for now, til my next blog!

8 Ways to Celebrate a Long and Happy Marriage

Recently, a friend mentioned that she had attended her college class reunion. “I had not seen many of these people in years,” she said, “but like me, most of these couples have been married 45 years or more. With today’s high divorce rate, I was a bit surprised.”
Covenant Marriage
According to a report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, in 1900, there were 709,000 marriages and 55,751 divorces. In 2004, the 2,279,000 marriages resulted in a 3.7 percent divorce rate per 1,000 population (estimates). The median age at first marriage in 2003 was 27.1 for males and 25.3 for females. Not only are there more divorces, but also both men and women marry later than several generations ago. Yet with improvements in health care, the longevity rate rises. This means more couples who stay together can expect to celebrate a golden wedding anniversary and beyond.
Some marriages cannot be measured by the quantity of years, but instead by the quality of the union.
One example is that of well-known author C.S. Lewis, who married late in life, and Joy Davidman. Lewis wrote, “H. and I feasted on love, every mode of it – solemn and merry, romantic and realistic, sometimes as dramatic as a thunderstorm, sometimes as comfortable and unemphatic as putting on your softslippers.”
Instead of the 40 or 50 years experienced in many marriages, they had only four years. Lewis died three years after his beloved Joy died of cancer. Yet his writings offer great insight into the true nature of marriage and love.
Simple Ways to Celebrate
If you’re like most senior adults, you celebrate your wedding anniversary, birthdays, Valentine’s Day,
and Christmas each year. But when you consider the blessings of having a long-time marriage partner, wouldn’t it be fun to celebrate more often?
Like other worthwhile things in life, any form of celebration requires some planning. However, senior adults report that those serendipitous occasions often provide the most fun and adventure. Some may be expensive; others may be low- or no-cost.
Here are some suggestions to make the most of your years as a couple.
Plan a vacation together. Have you dreamed of taking a cruise, a trip to Europe, or a summer excursion to Alaska? Expensive? Yes, but the time spent saving and planning for the trip adds to the pleasure.
Difficult? No. Working out the details of travel and sightseeing as a couple could be one of your best investments in the health of your marriage.
Check colleges and universities in your area for plays, musical performances, and concerts. Often free or low-cost, these provide cultural enrichment you’ll enjoy.
Written by Carolyn R. Tomlin

In FOCUS: Cheesecakes

I was watching the Lifestyle networhk when I saw this throwout between Bobby Flay and the heir to the multi-million Cheesecake empire from JUNIORS!

Bobby Flay made an Apple Glazed cheescake while the Juniors mogul made a Devil's Food Cheesecake...surprisinly, Booby Flay won as his take was more of unconventional according to the two foodies that served as the judges...

Well here's a little info about the faous JUNIORS cheesecake

visit: http:// juniorscheesecake.com

The Wind Chucker

I saw a documentary at DISCOVERY CHANNEL about a wind chucker. Well wind chuckers are basically "manghihilot" in our culture only they are a bit different in such a way that they believe that the cause of most ilnesses is wind or "hangin" or the "lamig"...
With an unshakeable conviction that angin or ‘wind’ is the root of all illnesses and ailments, Ida, the traditional healer from the Malay heartland of Kelantan, uses massage and often painful treatments to rid her patients of ‘trapped wind’ in their bodies. Working as a conduit who channels unwanted wind, burping features prominently in Ida's unusual repertoire of treatments. Against the rich cultural backdrop of Malaysia's East Coast, this is a quirky but heartfelt story of how age-old therapies like “wind-chucking” continue to have recognition and credence as a health remedy in traditional societies.

Rainy Yet Blissful

Last Saturday, we coordinated a wedding at Moon Garden, Tagaytay. Thouh it was rainy, the couple was guaranteed a blissful wedding ceremony and reception.

In our part, kahit maulan at mahirap magbuhat (all girls kami on that day), super sulit when the bride thanked us for her "dream wedding".
Here are some pics...

Table setting by Town's Delight

The couple's gazebo...

Reception venue set-up....

"Payo sa Mag-asawa"

50 Payo for Mag-Asawa
....from the book of Ptr. Ed Lapiz of Day by Day church

1. LAGING TANDAAN NA KAYO AY REGALO NG DIOS PARA SA ISA’T ISA
Remembering that your spouse is a gift from God is a healthy thing to do. It will somehow help you avoid thinking that your spouse is just a chance; worst, a mistake. Totoo naman talaga na ang asawa ay regalo ng Dios. Ang asawa ay hindi lang napulot kung saan. Ang asawa ay hindi galing sa impakto. Lalong hindi siya hulog ng impiyerno. Ang asawa ay regalo ng Dios. Laging tandaan na ang mga regalo ng Dios ay mabuti. Ang asawa mo ay isa sa mga mabubuting regalo ng Dios sa iyo.

2. IPAKITA AT IPADAMA ANG PAG-IBIG SA PARAAN GUSTO NIYA.
May mga mag-asawang nagsabing:
“Hindi ko ,maramdamang mahal ako ng aking asawa.”
Ang dahilan- hindi siya minamahal sa paraang gusto niya. Baka naman kasi hindi sinasabi sa asawa kung paano niya gustong mahalin. Hindi masama at lalong hindi nakakahiya na sabihin sa iyong asawa kung paano mo ibig mahalin. Malaking tulong din kung tatanungin mo ang iyong asawa kung paano niya gustong mahalin. Lalo kang mamahalin ng asawa mo kung mamahalin mo siya sa paraang gusto niya.

3. SA ARI-ARIAN AT PERA HUWAG MAG KANYA-KANYA
Sa mag-asawa, ang ari-arian ng isa ay ari-arian ng dalawa. Walang “akin, akin.” Walang “sa’yo, sa’yo”. Lahat “atin ito.” Ang perang kinita ng isa ay pera ng mag-asawa.
If in marriage the man and the woman were one flesh, then what is owned by one is owned by the other.
Kaya huwag nang magtaguan pa. Ilabas na ang perang pinaakaka-ipit- ipit sa pitaka.

4. SHOWER EACH OTHER WITH LOVE.
Diligin ninyo ng pag-ibig ang isa’t-isa para sumagana ang pagsasama. Ang maayos at matatag na pagsasama ng mag-asawa ay hindi nagaganap nang basta basta ito ay parang halaman na inaalagaan at dindiligan. Pag-ibig ang ipandilig, hindi masamang hinala, paninira, o pangungutya.

5. MAGING CREATIVE SA PAGPAPAKITA AT PAGPAPADAMA NG PAG-IBIG
Ang pagiging creative sa pagpapadama ng pag-ibig ay napakalaking tulong sa pagpapanatili ng init ng pagsasama ng mag-asawa. Kung nag-iisip para maging creative, may thrill, may excitement! Therefore hindi boring. Nakasasawa kung paulit-ulit lang. paminsan-minsan dapat mayrong konting pagbabago sa pagpapahayag at pagpappadam ng pag-ibig.
Halimbawa:
Kung lagi mo lang sinasabi sa asawa mo “ I love you, “ ngayon isulat mo sa magandang papel at ilagay mo sa magandang frame. O di ba creative?Kung laging papel at ballpen ang ginagamit mo to say “ I love you” to your spouse, ngayon kung kaya mong magrent ng jet plane ipasulat mo sa ulap sa pamamagitan ng usok ang “ Ilove you” addressed to your spouse.
From paper and pen. To sky and usok. Wow! Di ba creative? Maging creative, OK!

6. SHOW CONCERN ON THE INTERESTS OF YOUR SPOUSE.
Huwag lang himukin ang asawa na magpakita ng concern sa kung anung interests mayroon ka. Magkusa ka rin naman magpakita ng concern sa interests ng iyong asawa. Suportahan mo siya. Alamin ang paboritong sports ng iyong asawa at makipaglaro kung kaya mo rin lang. Makipag-usap sa asawa tungkol sa mga paksang gusto niya. Samahan ang asawa kung gusto niyang isama sa panood ng mga pelikulang gusto niya. Malaking tulong sa masayang pagsasama ang maging concern sa interests ng isat-isa

7. SATISFY THE SEXUAL NEED OF YOUR SPOUSE
Attend not only to your personal sexual satisfaction but also to the satisfaction of your spouse. Pag hindi mo sinikap na i-satisfy ang iyong asawa baka humanap siya ng ibang mag-sasatisfy sa kanya.
Misis:
· ihanda ang sarili para sa asawa.
· Maligo! Magpaganda! Magpabango!
· Huwag parang patay pag nakikipag “do.”
Mister:
·Huwag tratuhing sex object ang asawa mo.
·Be gentle at huwag gawing pang-akrobatik ang misis mo.
·Magtootbrush ka! Maligo! Magpabango
· Paano gaganahan ang misis mo kung mabaho anbg hininga mo, amoy lansangan ang ulo mo; amoy grasa ang katawan mo. Mahiya ka naman sa misis mo, no!
·Sikaping huwang maiwang bitin ang misis pag nakikipa “do.”

8. AVOID RETIRING TO BED WITH UNSETTLED ILL FEELING
Ang paminsan-minsang ma-offend ng asawa o maka-offend ng asawa ay bahagi na ng buhay mag-asawa. Kung sakaling ma-offend ka muli ng iyong asawa, huwag mong hayaang makatulog ka ng may sama ng loob sa kanya. Huwag hayaang makatulugan ang galit sa asawa, baka kasi pag pagising mo patay ka na. Pangit mamatay na may kimkim na sama ng loob sa asawa. Kung balak mong bukas ay alisin saiyong dibdib ang samang dulot ng iyong asawa, gawin mo na ngayon baka bukas ay huli na.

9. BE GENTLE AND TACTFUL IN CORRECTING AN ERROR COMMITTED BY YOUR SPOUSE
Walang asawang perfect. Lahat nagkakamali.
If you need to correct an error committed by your spouse, be specific. Attack an error committed by your spouse not his “being”. Approach your spouse gently and tactfully. Kung hindi ka magiging maingat at matalino sa pagtutuwid sa pagkakamali ng iyong asawa, ang pagtutuwid mo ay magiging sanhi pa ng lalong ikagugulo ng inyong pagsasama. Dapat lang na ituwid ang pag kakamali o kasalanan ng asawa... But make sure to do it intelligently, tactfully, and cautiously.
Remember: In making corrections, don’t forget to offer solutions.

10. MANALANGING MAGKASAMA
Sikaping huwag lumipas ang isang araw na hindi kayo nakapanalanging mag-asawa. Manalangin pakagising sa umaga at bago matulog sa gabi. Ang magkasamang pananalangin ay napakalaking tulong hindi lang sa “bonding” ng mag-asawa kundi maging sa pagharap rin nila sa problema. May mga problemang ang hirap lutasin ng “patayo”. Subalit walang problema na hindi malulutas kung ang mag-asawa ay “paluhod” na mananalanging magkasama.
Tandaan:
Ang isang buong araw ng mag-asawa ay maaapektuhan ng ilang minutong magkasamang panalangin nila.

11. RESPECT YOUR SPOUSE’S NEED FOR PRIVACY.
Natural sa tao na minsan ay gustong mag-isa. Totoo ito maging sa mag-asawa. Recognize your spouse’s need for privacy and honor it. Dapat ring tanggapin ang katotohanang may mga bagay na para lang sa asawa at hindi dapat pakialaman ng kahit sino pa. At mayron din naming mga pagkakataon na may gagawin ang asawa na hindi dapat pakialaman o panghimasukan dahil insulto sa kakayahan pag siya ay pinakialaman. Kahit pa ng asawa niya.

12. TUMUPAD SA PANGAKO
Ang pangko galing sa asawa ay nagdudulot ng saya. Pero higit na ligaya ang madarama kung ang asawa ay tumutupad sa pangako niya. Huwag lang puro pangako. Tumupad ka! Liligaya ang iyong asawa, titibay ang pasasama, kung sa pangako tumutupad ka! POGI points at BEAUTY points ang pagtupad sa pangako sa asawa.

13. PAG NAGALIT, SIKAPING TUMAHIMIK MUNA.
Matalinong pagpapasya ang tumatahimik muna pag nagalit sa asawa. Ang tao pag galit ay may tendensya na makapanakit. Sino mang nasaktan ay may tendensyang manlaban at manakit din naman. Makatutulong na maiwasan ang away at pananakit, kung sa panahong ikaw ay galit, manahimik muna, MANALANGIN at mag-isip-isip.

14. IWASAN ANG PAGSIGAW SA ASAWA LALO SA HARAP NG IBA.
Ang pagsisigaw sa asawa lalo na harap ng iba ay isang tanda ng kakulangan o kawalan ng paggalang sa asawa. Pwera na lang kung bingi ang asawa, hindi tamang sinisigawan siya. Nababastos at namumukhang tanga ang iyong asawa kung sisigawan mo siya lalo sa harap ng iba. Siguro naman ayaw mong nababastos at nagmumukhang tanga ang iyong asawa. Kaya huwag mong sisigawan ang iyong asawa.
15. BE APPRECIATIVE OF YOUR SPOUSE’S TALENTS ANG ABILITIES.
Congratulations sa mga gumagawa nito. At ‘yong hindi gumagawa nito, magbago na kayo! Make your respective spouses happy and be an encouragement to them, help develop your spouse’s talents and abilities. Malaking kagalakan at encouragement sa iyong asawa kung isa ka sa mga taong nag-a-appreciate sa kanya. Marami ang nagtatampo o nagagalit sa asawa dahil hindi ina-appreciate ang kanilang talento at abilidad ng kani-kanilang asawa.
Appreciate the talents and abilities of your spouse. But more importantly, appreciate your spouse. DO IT NOW.

16. IWASANG PINTASAN ANG ASAWA.
Hindi madaling tanggapin ang pintas galing sa ibang tao. Lalong mahirap tanggapin kung ang pintas ay galing aasawa mo. Napakasakit nito lalo pa kung naririnig ng ibang tao. Imbis na pintasan ang asawa mo tulungan na lang siyang magbago. At kung may sasabihin ka sa ibang tao tungkol sa asawa, magagandang bagay na lang ang ikuwento, huwag ang kapintasan niya.

17. TULUNGAN SIYANG HUWAG MAGKASALA.
Mas madaling makaiiwas sa pagkakasala ang iyong asawa kung tutulungan mo siya. Sa paglaban sa tukso suportahan ang asawa. Laging alalahanin na ang pagbagsak ng asawa ay pagbagsak ng pamilya. Alamin kung ano ang laban ng iyong asawa. Laban mo rin ang laban ng iyong asawa kaya lubos na tulungan siya.
Hindi-“BAHALAKA.” Ang kailangan –“SUPORTAHAN TA KA.”

18. ANG GALIT SA IBA AY HUWAG IBALING SA ASAWA.
Kung sakaling nagalit ka sa ibang tao, halimbawa sa presidente ng kompanyang pinagtatrabahuhan mo, sa boss mo, o sa kanino mang tao na tinitingala mo na hindi mo kayang ipakita ang galit mo, huwag mong ibaling sa iyong asawa ang galit mo. Maging aware ka dito dahil pwedeng mangyari ito nang hindi mo namamalayan. Unconsciously you might transfer your anger with someone else to your spouse.
It happens to some.I pray it won’t happen to you.

19. WHEN YOU HAVE OFFENDED YOUR SPOUSE, LEARN TO SHOW YOU’RE SORRY.
Pag na-offend mo ang iyong asawa, kung talagang sorry ka, ipakita mo na totoong sorry ka. When you realized that you have wronged your spouse, don’t just say “I’m sorry.” Show that you are really are sorry. Show it with your face and show it with your action. May mga nagsosorry sa asawa na habang sinasabi ang “I’m sorry” ay nakangisi. Lalo tuloy nabubuwisit ang asawa niya sa kanya. May mga nagsasabing “I’m sorry” sa asawa na wala namang pagbabagong makita sa pakikitungo sa asawa.
When you say you’re sorry, mean it. And show that you really are sorry.
20. FORGIVE.
Patawarin mo ang iyong asawa. Kailan? Pagnagkasala! Kahit pa gaano katindi ang kasalanang nagawa sa iyo ng asawa mo, patawarin mo siya para wala kang bigat na dinadala. Ang di-pagpapatawad ay nakasasakit ng ulo. Nakakapangit pa ito! Talo ang di nagpapatawad. Panalo ka kung magpapatawad ka. Ang pagpapanatili ng galit ay nagdudulot ng hinagpis at karaniwang humahantong sa pananakit. May galit ka pa ba sa asawa mo? Patawarin mo na siya.
The earlier you forgive when you get offended by your spouse, is better than best.
Tandaan:
Hindi optional ang magpatawad. Ang magpatawad ay utos ng Dios.

21. AVOID NAGGING
Nakakainis ang asawang nagger. Ayon sa ilang asawa ng nakausap ko:
“Lalo akong nagtatampo pag nina-nag ako ng asawa ko.”
“Gusto kong sungangain ang bibig ng asawa ko
“Nanliliit ako and I feel stupid pag nina-nag ako sa asawa ko.”
Ikaw, ano ang pakiramdam mo pag nina-nag ka ng asawa mo?
Kung may nagawang pagkakamali ang iyong asawa at gusto mong sabihin sa kanya, minsan lang itong sabihin sa kanya. At huwag idagdag pa dito ang mga dati pang mali na nagawa niya. Sa pagsasalita sikaping maging mahinahon, huwag pagalit, hindi nang-iinis o nanlalait.

22. HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR.
Nakakapangit ang laging nakakunot ang noo. Sa mag-asawa kailangan ang ngiti at tawa. Can you imagine a couple without a sense of humor? Boring di ba? Ang lungkot ng buhay ng mag-asawa pag walang sense of humor. Parang laging may patay. It’s nice to make people happy especially your spouse. Have a sense of humor. Patawanin mo ang iyong asawa. Learn to crack good funny jokes. Dagdag ligaya kung ang asawa ay marunong magpatawa.

23. MANGARAP! MAGTIYAGA! MATALINONG GUMAWA.
Libreng mangarap. Mangarap kayong mag-asawa at magkasamang magplano tungo sa katuparan ng inyong pangarap. Walang challenge ang buhay kung walang pangarap sa buhay ang mag-asawa. Magkaroon kayo ng kaisahan sa inyong pangarap. Mahirap para sa mag-asawa ang walang isang pangarap. Walang tagumpay kung walang pangarap. Pero huwag lang puro pangarap. Baka bangungutin kayo kung puro pangarap lang. Maging masipag, at matiyaga. Magtrabaho nang husto, gumawa, at maging matalino sa paggawa.

24. MORE THAN WINNING THE ARGUMENT, AIM TO WIN YOUR SPOUSE.
Natural sa mag-asawa ang paminsan-minsan ay magkaroon ng argumento. Kung sakaling manyari ito sa inyo, aim on winning your spouse, more than winning the argument against your spouse. Aanhin mo ang manalo sa argumento kung mawawala naman sa’yo ang asawa mo. Sige, isipin mo.

25. MAGING ATTRACTIVE SA IYONG ASAWA.
Maraming asawa ang nahulog sa kandugan ng iba kasi hindi na attractive para sa kanya ang kanyang asawa. Huwag kayong magpabaya sa inyong itsura. Mag-exercise at iwasana ang walang pakundangang pagkain nang sobra para di masira ang inyong pigura. At sikapin na rin na maging mabango para sa asawa. Tanungin din ang asawa kung anong amoy at itsura ang gusto niya. Sundin ang gusto ng asawa para maging attractive sa kanya. I-attract mo ang iyong asawa baka kasi iba pa ang umattract sa kanya. Sige ikaw rin. Baka magsisi ka.
26. MAGING KONTENTO KAYO.
Delikado ang maaaring kahinatnan ng mag-asawang walang kakuntentuhan sa kung ano’ng mayron sila. Gulo ang kasasadlakan. Ano ba ang kailangan para maging kontento ang tao? Ang kasapatan ba ng lahat ng pangangailangan? Kung dito nakabase ang kakuntentuhan walang mag-asawang mauubusan ng pangangailan. Therefore, walang mag-asawang makukuntento. Hindi masama ang maghangad ng karagdagan para sa kinabukasan. Pero maging kuntento muna at magpakaligaya sa kung ano ang mayron kayo ngayon. Baka kasi hindi dumating ang bukas. Pag dumating ang “bukas,” ang “bukas” ay naging “ngaun.” Kaya kung ano mayron kayo, magpakaligaya at maging kuntento. Kung kuntento ka sakaling mamatay ka ngayon, maluwag ang iyong dibdib na ikaw ay papanaw at marahil nakangiti ka pa hanggang kabaong.

26. UMIWAS SA MGA SITWASYON NA MAARING MAGBUNGA NG MASASAMANG HINALA
Para hindi ka mapagbintangan na may ginagawang masama,iwasan ang mga sitwasyong kanina-hinala. Huwag kang magasasama o sasama sa hindi mo asawa sa isang lugar na makukwestiyon ang iyong pagsasama.
Halimbawa:
Sa loob ng pribadong sasakyan (dalawa lang kayo sa loob ng kotse);
Sa park ng pang magnobyo o pang mag-asawa; Sa loob ng hotel.
Mahirap paniwalan na ang isang lalake at isang babaeng galing sa loob ng hotel ay nagprayer meeting, nagkwentuhan, nagjack en poy lang. Mag-ingat! Umiwas!

28. BE GENTLE...
Gentleness to your spouse can be best exemplified by being considerate of your spouse’s feeling and thoughts. Bago mo gawin ang isang bagay o bago mo sabihin ang gusto mong sabihin isipin mo muna kung ano ang maaring bunga nito sa isip at damdamin ng iyong asawa. Hindi komo’t gusto mo ay gagawin mo na lang basta-basta.. I-kunsidera mo naman ang isip at damdamin ng iyong asawa. Sa pagsasalita, sa gawa, maging sa paghipo at paghawak, maging gentle sa asawa.
29. BE PROUD OF YOUR SPOUSE
Ipinagmamalaki mo ba ang iyong asawa? Dapat lang! Proud ka bang nakikita ang itsura ng asawa mo o gusto mong takpan siya ng dyaryo habang ipinakikilala mo siya sa ibang tao? Huwag mong ikahiya ang iyong asawa. Be proud of your spouse. Huwag mong ikahiya nag iyong asawa.

30. IGALANG ANG OPINION NG ASAWA.
Ang lahat ay may karapatang magpahayg ng kanyang sariling opinion. Ito man ay mali o tama. Igalang ang opinion ng asawa. Kahit di ka sumang-ayon sa opinion ng iyong asawa ipakita mong iginagalang mo ito. Ang hindi pagkakapareho ng opinion ng iyong asawa sa iyo ay hindi nangangahuluganng mali siya. Hindi lahat ng naiiba ay mali . Pero kahit pa hindi ka sang-ayon sa opinion ng asawa, dapat pa rin na igalang ang opinion niya. Ang hindi pagsangayon ay hindi nangagngahulugan ng kawalan ng paggalang. Ang mahalaga, igalang ang opinion ng asawa. Tanda kasi ito ng paggalang sa kanya. Igalang ang asawa.

31. HUWAG MAGING “BOSSY”.
Sa mag-asawa walang “amo.” Walang boss. Dapat parehong naglilingkod sa isa’t-isa. The husband being appointed by God as head of the wife is not taken as “Lord over the wife.” Hindi rin naman tama na ang wife ay hindi nagpapasakop sa husband. Huwag mong tratuhing alila ang iyong asawa. Pumarehas ka kahit pa mas malaki ang kinikita mo kumpara sa kanya. Kung uutusan ang asawa don’t forget the magic word-“PLEASE.” At kung wala kang ginagawa at may ginagawa ang iyong asawa, huwag mo na siyang abalahin pa. kung kaya mo rin lang ang gagawin, huwag mo nang iasa pa sa asawa.

32. MAGING MAUNAWAIN.
Kung gusto mong lalo kang mahalin ng iyong asawa ipakita mong inuunawa mo siya. Totoong kailangan mo ang pang-unawa. Pero higit sa hanapin mo sa asawa ang unawain ka, mas unahin mo ang unawain siya. Sa bandang huli ang hinahanap mong pang-unawa galing sa iyong asawa ay ibibigay din niya. Ang pagpapkita ng pang-unawa ay malinaw na ebidensya ng pagmamahal sa asawa.

33. KEEP COMMUNICATION LINES OPEN.
Dapat lang sa mag-asawa na alamin at ipaalam ang kalagayan ng isa’t-isa. This will not happen if the couple will not keep their communication open. Basic indicators of good communication between a husband and wife:
Clear transmission of message- be it thoughts or feelings.
Listening- Don’t just butt in.
Understanding- seeing from the perspective of the one who speaks...
Empathy-feeling with.
Maraming problema ang maiiwasan ng mag-asawa kung laging bukas ang komunikasyon nila para sa isa’t-isa.

34. MAGING MAHINAHON SA PAG-UUSAP PAG MAY PROBLEMANG NILUULUTAS.
Walang problemang di malulutas sa mahinahong pag-uusap. Sa totoo lang, maraming problema ang hindi na sana lumala pa kung sa pag-uusap ay naging mahinahon ang mag-asawa. Hindi makakatulong sa paglutas ng problema kung nagsisisihan ang mag-asawa... Magpokus sa solusyon huwag sa pagkakamali o sa problema ng isa’t-isa. Iwasan din ang pangungutya at magtaas na tono pag nagsasalita. Bahagi rin ng pagiging mahinahon ang paggamit ng mga tamang salita.

35. LET YOUR SPOUSE KNOW YOUR FEELINGS AND THE PREDICAMENT YOU ARE IN.
Tell your spouse not only your thoughts but also your feelings. Letting your spouse know your feelings and the predicament you are in will somehow help your spouse act accordingly. Ewan ko lang kung nakakabasa ng isip ang asawa mo, hindi naman manghuhula ang asawa mo para malaman niya ang iniisip at nararamdaman mo. Sa panahong nanghihina o nagdaramdam ka, magandang sabihin ito sa asawa. Huwag sarilinin ang pagdurusa. Dahil ang mag-asawa dapat magkasama sa hirap at ginhawa. Walang silbi ang asawa kung sa panahon ng pagdurusa ay hindi nakikiisa. Pero mahirap malaman ng iyong asawa ang lagay mo kung hindi mo ito sasabihin sa kanya.
Huwag mahiya.
Huwag mag-alala.
Magsabi ka sa asawa.

36. IWASANG ISUMBAT ANG MGA NAKALIPAS NA PAGKAKAMALING NAGAWA NIYA.
May mga taong pag nagalit sa asawa ay binabalik-balikan ang matagal ng pagkakamaling nagawa ng asawa. At pauli-ulit na isinusumbat ito sa kanya. Pag ganito ng ganito, sisikip ang mundo ng iyong asawa at baka marapatin pang iwan ka niya. Ang kasalanang pinagsisisihan na ay hindi na dapat isumbat pa. pag may bagong nagawang pagkakamali ang iyong asawa, huwag mong isama iyong mga luma na. walang kahihinatnang maganda ang isumbat sa asawa ang pagkakamaling lipas na.

37. IWASANG GAWIN ANG ANO MANG BAGAY NA ALAM MONG IGAGALIT NIYA.
May mga asawa na talagang nananadya. Tahasang ginagawa ang mga bagay na alam na ikagagalit ng kanyang asawa. HUWAG GUMAYA SA KANILA. Yon naman eh… kung ayaw mong masira ang pamilya. Hindi lang asawa ang masamang epekto pagtahasang ginagawa mo ang alam mong nakasasakit sa iyong asawa. Maaaring gantihan ka ng iyong asawa at pati ang anak mo, maaaring gayahin ka at tahasan ring saktan ka. Huwag gawin sa asawa ang mga bagay na ayaw mong sa iyo ay gawin niya.

38. SA PANAHONG NANGHIHINA ANG LOOB NG ASAWA, MAGING SOURCE OF ENCOURAGEMENT PARA SA KANYA.
May mga panahon maaaring manghina ang iyong asawa gawa ng kinakaharap na problema. Maging katuwang ka sa pagresolba ng problema at huwag na maging pabigat pa. Kung kailangang magsakripisyo para makatulong-magsakri pisyo! Kung kailangang tumahimik para makatulong- manahimik! Gawin mo ang magagawa mo para matulungang malutas ang problema ng asawa. Be a source of encouragement .

39. IWASAN ANG PAKIKIALAM SA MGA BAGAY NA INAARING PERSONAL NG IYONG ASAWA.
Personal letters, text messages, bag at pitaka, at iba pang mga bagay na inaaring personal ng iyong asawa, huwag mong basta-basta babasahin, kakalkalin, at pakikialaman.

40. MAGTIWALA
Ang pagpapakita ng pagtitiwala sa asawa ay malaking tulong tungo sa magandang pagsasama. Kung noon ay niloloko ka ng iyong asawa ang magtiwala sa kanya ay maaring maging tulong tungo sa pagbabago niya. Para sa isang naglolokong asawa hindi madaling gawin ang magbago lalo kung walang tulong na manggagaling sa kanyang asawa. Kung sakaling sa kabila ng ipinakita mong pagtitiwala sa iyong asawa ay niloko ka pa rin niya, alalahanin mong sa iyo ay walang nawala. Sa iyong asawa ay marami ang nawala. Sa pagtitiwala, walang nawawala. Sa manloloko, marami ang nawawala.

41. MAGING BEST FRIEND KA NG ASAWA MO.
“Ako ng asawa mo.” Yes!” tinuturing ka bang kaibigan ng iyong asawa?
Sagot pls.________ _________ ______
Sa hanay ng mga kaibigan ng iyong asawa, “Ikaw ba ay kinikilala ng iyong asawa ng kanyang matalik na kaibigan?”
Sagot pls.________ _________ _________
“Asawa mo, best friend ka ba?”
sagot pls.________ _________ _________ _
Dapat matalik na kaibigan ka ng iyong asawa.
Mas dapat…PINAKAMATALIK.

42. HUWAG GAWING KATATAWANAN ANG KAMALIAN, KAKULANGAN, AT KAIBAHAN NG IYONG ASAWA.
Lahat ay nakakamali, lahat ay nagkukulang. Lahat ay may kaibahan. Walang taong matutuwa pag pinagtatawanan ang kanyang kakulangan, kamalian, o kaibahan. Tahasang pangungutya sa asawa ang pagtawanan ang kaibahan o pagkakamali niya. Hindi tama na ginagawang biro ang pagkukulang, o mga bagay na hindi pangkaraniwan sa asawa.
Gaya ng:
Kuntil sa tenga,
Putol na daliri o sobra sa sampu ang daliri,
Ilong na parang tapon,
Kulay ng balat,
Butas ng ilong na mukhang garapon,
At iba pa.
Huwag pagtawanan ang kamalian, kaibahan at kahinaan ng asawa. Iwasang pagtawanan ang asawa. Baka gulpihin ka o kaya baka mawalan ka ng asawa.

43. MAGING MAKA-DIOS.
Sa pagsasama ng mag-asawa ang pagiging maka-Dios ang pinakamahalaga. Ang pagiging maka-Dios ang siyang magdadala sa mag-asawa sa isang matibay na pagsasama at totoong pagkakaisa. Natural sa mag-asawa ang datnan ng iba’t-ibang problema. Pagka maka-Dios ang mag-asawa mananatiling matatag ang kanilang pagsasama kahit gaano katindi ang problemang kinakaharap nila. Ang ikinatatag ng ugnayan ng mag-asawa ay hindi nakadepende sa dami ng pera o sariling kakayahan ng mag-asawa. Ang ikinatatatag ng relasyon ng mag-asawa ay nakadepende sa Dios na siyang pundasyon ng pagsasama. Sa panahong tahimik o may kaguluhan, panahong tag-init o tag-ulan, maging maka-Dios ka at ang iyong asawa.
44. BE ATTENTIVE PAG MAY SINASABI SIYA SA IYO.
Di ba pag kinakausap mo ang iyong asawa gusto mo nakikinig siya? Gusto rin ng asawa mo na pakinggan mo siya pag kinakausap ka niya. Di ba ayaw mo na may ginagawang kung anu-ano ang iyong asawa pag kinakausap mo siya? O di ganon din ang gawin mo. Huwag kang gumagawa ng kung anu-ano pag kinausap ka ng asawa mo. May mag-asawang mukhang magkausap silang dalawa. Mukha lang pala. Dahil ang kausap nila ay sari-sarili pala at hindi ang isa’t-isa. Nakakabanas! Di ba?
Babala: Huwag silang tularan.

45. IPAKITA AT IPADAMA NA MAHALAGA ANG IYONG ASAWA.
Sarap ng pakiramdam kung feeling important ka di ba? Ang asawang nakadama na siya ay di mahalaga sa kanyang asawa ay nag-mumukhang aba, nahahabag sa sarili, at nagiging madrama. Ipakita at ipadama na mahalaga sa iyo ang iyong asawa. Masarap kasama ang taong sa iyo ay nagpapahalaga. marami ng mag-asawa ang naghiwalay dahil sa kawalan ng pagpapahalaga sa isa’t-isa. Ipakita at ipadama na mahalaga sa iyo ang iyong asawa.

46. IIWAS SA SELOS ANG ASAWA.
Maraming mag-asawa ang nag-away at nasira ang buhay dahil sa selos. Marami ang nasiraan ng bait, pumatay at napatay dala ng matinding pagseselos. Natural na magselos kung kaselos-selos. magtaka ka kung may dapat pagselosan sa’yo ang iyong asawa tapos hindi siya nagseselos. Ang pinakamaganda, iiwas sa selos ng asawa. Kung sakaling hindi sinasadya may nagawa ka o kaya may nagawa ang iba na napansin mong ipinagseselos sa iyo ng iyong asawa, ayusin agad. Huwag patagalin pa. linawin ito at sikaping huwag maulit pa.
Tandaan: Ang selos ay parang lason. Naninira, nakamamatay.

47. HUWAG SABAT NANG SABAT KUNG ASAWA MO ANG KAUSAP NG IBA.
May mga asawang sabat ng sabat kahit hindi siya ang kinakausap.Turn off ka ba sa asawang sabat ng sabat? Correct ka diyan! Nakakaturn-off talaga ang asawang sabat nang sabat kahit hindi kinakausap. Kaya ikaw, iwasan ang pagsasabat-sabat kung asawa mo ang kausap. Kahanga-hanga ang asawang di palasabat.

48. MAGSAMA AT MAGKAISA SA PAGGAWA NG DESISYON.
Sa paggawa ng desisyon dapat lang na magkasama at nakakaisa ang mag-asawa. Sa mag-asawa, hindi tamang isa lang ang gagawa ng desisyon lalo pa kung maselan o major decision ang gagawin. Kagaya ng:
Paglipat ng bahay,
Pagbili at pagbebenta ng ari-arian,
Pagdisiplina sa mga anak,
At iba pa.
Bago gumawa ng desisyon dapat lang na ang mag-asawa ay nag-uusap muna at nananalanging magkasama. Daan ito tungo sa pagkakaisa.

49. HUWAG KALIMUTAN ANG MGA ARAW NA PINAHAHALAGAHAN NG IYONG ASAWA.
Hindi dapat makalimutan ang mga araw na pinahahalagahan ng iyong asawa lalo na ang birthday at wedding anniversary. Give your spouse a special greetings on special occasions. Better still, give your spouse a treat on special occasions. Gawin mo ito sa asawa mo. Sigurado ako, LOVE points ang bunga nito.
Remember: Don’t forget!

50. BE RESOLVED TO LIVE WITH YOUR SPOUSE ALL YOUR LIFE.
Ang relasyon ng mag-asawa ay panghabambuhay. May kasabihan: “Ang pag-aasawa ay hindi parang kaning isusubo at iluluwa pag napaso.” In solving marital problems, lot of solutions can be considered as the options. God hates divorce. God intends marriage to be for life. Maraming mag-asawa ang naghiwalay na. Marami na sila. Hindi na kayo dapat dumagdag pa. Magsama kayong mag-asawa sa lungkot at ligaya, sa hirap o ginhawa, meron o walang pera, hanggang may hininga.
Remember:
What God has joins together, Let no man separate.

Planning A Baby

Most couples don't just wake up one day and think, "Let's start a family now!" As much as some might wish their partners were that impulsive and enthusiastic, it's better to put some thought into this baby thing. Here's your to-do list.

Talk
Make sure you're reasonably settled, financially stable, getting along well (a kid won't help a faltering relationship), and 100 percent (not 99 percent) certain you both want this change in your lives.

Get Ready Physically
If you haven't had an annual exam in years, schedule one. Then book a pelvic exam and update your immunizations. Also ask your doctor about vitamins and supplements (folic acid) you should be taking.

Uncover Your Genes
Depending on your background, your doc may refer you to a genetic counselor who will run a battery of tests to see if you carry genetic disorders like Tay-Sachs, cystic fibrosis, or sickle cell anemia.

Tune up Your Teeth
All of the extra blood flow and estrogen in the body can lead to more plaque production and bleeding gums, so get a cleaning before you get pregnant and make sure your smile is in its optimal condition.

See a Financial Planner
Or give yourself a financial checkup. According to a 2002 report from the U.S. Department of Agriculture, it costs about $250,000 to raise a child to age 18.

Learn Your Cycle
Start tracking your cycles now so you know when (or about when) you ovulate. Most cycles are 28 days (making day 14 the best time to conceive), but this varies from woman to woman.

Make a Baby Budget
Save yourself a lot of stress by setting up your budget now for when the baby is born. Diapers aren't cheap!

Look into Disability and Life Insurance
Disability must be purchased before you become pregnant if you want it to cover your birth and postpartum time. Because most policies require several months before you're eligible, buy it in advance.

Find out About Family Leave
Have you been at your current job long enough to be covered by the Federal Family Leave Act? Every employer has its own policies on top of the law regarding how much maternity leave is paid (or partially subsidized).

Go to Jamaica!
Fly to France! Sail into the sunset! Really enjoy being a married couple -- a family of two. Travel becomes tricky (if not limiting) with a newborn, so get to as many sites now as you can (within your budget, of course).

Relax
This shouldn't feel like work., so have fun and don't get freaked out if you don't make a baby on the first shot. If you're in your mid-30s and don't conceive after six months, check in with your ob-gyn (three months if it makes you feel better). There are many variables that decide your fertility. In fact, half of all issues couples have lie with the men.

[Nestperts] Mary Jane Minkin, MD, an ob-gyn in private practice in New Haven, Connecticut, and coauthor of A Woman's Guide to Sexual Health; Audrey Couto McClelland, coauthor of Preconception Plain & Simple; and Brette Sember, author of Your Practical Pregnancy Planner: Everything You Need to Know About the Financial and Legal Aspects of Preparing for Your New Baby

When Blogging Is Also About MAKING MONEY...

Who says your just bumming when you are in front of your PC or laptop when in fact. you are probably making money...oh yes...lotsa of moolah baby...all thru blogging...

Checkout http://linkfromblog.com

For the married Ones...

"Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat."
- Joanne Woodward, actress, television and theatrical producer
(Joanne married Paul Newman and stayed married till Paul died)

Uber Busy Weekend= SICKNESS

Here's a rundown of my busy weekend...
Saturday-18th birthday OTD at Discovery Suites
Sunday-Hospital with Nanay
Monday-Occulars at Fernbrook (Janine Rallonza's 18th B-day, OTD)

Distributed unfiorms for sportsfest 2009
Met with Ms. Sab for turnover (wedding OTD on September 5, Moon Garden)